Throughout my time in the service and retail industries, I’ve been granted the privilege to interact and get to know several different kinds of people. Some of them are the nicest, most genuine people I can think of; these people take a genuine interest in my life and they share about their lives, and talking to them is the most natural thing in the world.
On the other end of the spectrum, however, I also got to know people that completely disregard other people; their feelings, wants, needs, and impulses rank above anything and everything else. Some people don’t seem to realize that my power is not omnipotent throughout the whole store and it’s policies (though some days I wish it was), and that I have very little say in what you see in the store.
Oh, a product’s been discontinued? I have no idea what I’m talking about, of course my store has it. She bought the same product here a year ago so it must be here!!!
The cooler’s broken, leaving your beer kinda warm? Clearly, that’s all my fault that I can’t fix it, never mind the fact that I have no training whatsoever in fixing any kind of cooler.
I didn’t do dishes one time? Oh, sorry, I thought you could haul your 300 pound ass off the couch for a half hour to do dishes for once in your life. Sorry I was busy working late for the fifth day in a row. Oops.
All of these things have happened.
And I’ve had just about enough of this. So, without further ado, I’m going to make a very simple list of what someone can do so they aren’t regarded as a complete asshole for the rest of their lives.
1) Don’t just shrug off something a friend is really excited and passionate about. Even if you have no interest in this project or topic your friend is, it’s a lot better to be a little bit curious about the project than to disinterestedly be playing Temple Run on your phone. I can’t tell you how happy I get when a friend asks me a question or two about my job; it shows that they care, and that they’re interested in what I’ve been up to.
For example, most of my friends are really into the Magic card game. I, personally, have no interest in playing whatsoever (and they’ve offered to cobble together a basic deck for me, too, which was hugely flattering). But it is rather entertaining to listen in when they’re all playing against each other. And I was curious about the different characteristics of different cards, so I went right ahead and asked about them, which led to a 15-ish minute conversation about the different classes and what they all did. It was pretty interesting. Too reminiscent of the Pokemon cards I used to play with as a kid, but interesting.
2) Be humble! No matter how smart, funny, hot, or brilliant you are, there will always be someone that’s smarter, funnier, hotter, and brilliant-er than you.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s okay to take pride in something done well, or to be proud of something that you have worked countless hours to master.
It’s not okay to talk about how “terrible” everyone else is at your talent in comparison, or that you’re “sooooo far ahead of everyone else”. If you’re a person who does this, know that you’re tacky and I hate you.
Speaking of which…
3) Pick your battles. Not everything needs to be up for debate, or argued about. You don’t need to waste a ton of energy raging over something tiny, like if someone puts the toilet paper roll on the roller the wrong way. Seriously, it would take as much effort to change it to your preferred orientation than to go hunt down your roommate and scream at them. At least wipe your butt first.
Because at the end of the day, is this worth it?
For me, I find what works best for me is asking myself this:
“Will it be more effort to get angry about this or would it take more effort to just fix it?”
Usually sorts it out for me.
But if it’s something that’s genuinely something worth arguing about, by all means, bring it up! If you’re the only one cleaning up after your roommates, it’s totally okay to bring that up. You should remember though…
4) If something’s an issue, bring it up (respectfully).
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve let resentment about something that really wasn’t a big deal boil over into a huge yelling match with someone. Personally, it’s one of my worst traits and makes me a bit of a shit to live with. How can you know what’s wrong if I never say anything? And it’s certainly not fair to yell at someone for something that they didn’t know was an issue in the first place.
In most cases, bringing up the target in such a way that nobody’s on the defensive is the best way to start. It makes it easier to communicate what the problem has been, and how it’s been making you feel.
Though in every case ever, don’t forget to bring a solution to the problem in with you.
5) Know when do joke, know when to keep your mouth shut.
In the years that I’ve been in retail, the most common joke I hear after an item doesn’t scan onto someone’s total (whether it be because the bar code was scratched to hell, my scanner had a freak-out…) is “well, I guess it’s free.”
And nothing makes me want to put someone’s head through a window so much as that little zinger.
It’s a joke as old as time itself, and anyone who has worked in any kind of sales environment has heard that joke at least a dozen times. Where I do understand that you’re trying to make a joke out of the situation, it’s as old and stale as the bread I found at the back of my pantry once. And it’s not that witty, it’s not that funny, so please stop.
Most of the time in the service industry, if you think you have a witty remark about something, you don’t. Just…don’t.
On the other hand, though, if it’s a legitimately thought-provoking, funny, insightful remark, I’d love to hear it! I’m running out of material!
xoxo
Rianna
redheadrianna's Blog 